I want to grow a flower for every time someone tells me F*** you. Then I ll go back to that person and pin the flower on their lapel in a gesture of friendship. And while they are looking down on it in astonishment, I ll bunch up my knuckles and punch them in the face.
–
Jarod Kintz,
I Want Two apply for a job at our country’s largest funeral home, and then wear a suit and noose to the job interview.